Spiritual Pride
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Respectable, orderly, well-to-do-in-the-world people, who have comfortable pews, in church; who are on familiar terms with the minister; and whose opinions, on matters ecclesiastical as well as secular, have weight — are very much inclined to lapse into the impression that they are elevated above the masses of the people in spiritual, as well as in external things; that they are better than the poor, the humble, and depressed. You will see them passing up the aisles of our churches, and taking the uppermost seats, with the air of people whose right to these places are as natural as their right to the elegant homes their money has purchased. And no one questions their right to these seats; for they have a property in them, by honorable purchase, the same as they have in their stores or dwellings. We are looking below all this, to the spirit which animates them — to the approving self-consciousness which gives quality to the soul.
These individuals are very much in danger of falling into a base kind of spiritual pride. There is a spiritual pride which has its origin in superior intellectual qualities. Because a man is able to talk on theological subjects with some acuteness, and to rise quite above the ordinary range of thought in matters of doctrine — he may indulge the conceit that he is spiritually in advance of his brethren, when he may not have overcome a single evil of his selfish nature! The danger here is very great.
But there is another and baser kind of spiritual pride, which builds its foundation walls on the sandy basis of wealth and mere social rank. The churches are full of this. It is the moth and rust that are eating daily at their inner life. There is a certain fashion in religion, or rather in church-going, which claims of its votaries as nice an observance as is demanded by fashion in dress; and it is far more hurtful than the latter, because it involves a degradation of spiritual things, and makes of the votary, so far as religion is concerned, a mere pretender.
Mrs. Hartman, the wife of a substantial merchant, was very much inclined to indulge in this latter species of spiritual pride, if we may dignify it with the name of "spiritual." She was a pious woman in externals. Her place was never vacant in church, and her demeanor while there was always very devout. She never absented herself from the communion table, nor neglected any of the public charities sanctioned by Christian usage. The minister's wife was her very dear friend, and the minister himself a regular visitor at the house. In a general way, Mrs. Hartman talked well on religious themes, which she always made prominent when in the minister's company.
Very naturally did Mrs. Hartman come to think well of herself — in a Christian point of view; and if on some occasions her thoughts could have been seen, they would not have differed very much from those of the Pharisee, so strongly placed by our Lord in contrast with the humble Publican. It is very certain that her estimate of the spiritual condition of the poor people who attended worship in the same church, on each recurring Sunday, was on a level with her estimate of their natural condition. The external, in her thought, corresponded, with the internal; and so she held herself in stately attitudes when she met any of them that she happened to know, or spoke with forced smiles, condescendingly. Some were pleased with her notice; some felt her manner as a spur to pride, and experienced annoyance; while a few met her with quiet, self-possessed exteriors, that a little chafed her in return.
Among the latter was a Mrs. Royal, a widow in poor health and poor circumstances. She had two little girls, aged seven and nine years, delicate, sensitive creatures, who were loved by her with a tenderness that grew deeper as health and strength declined. By her needle she earned the bread that nourished them. At one time she had sewing from the family of Mrs. Hartman; but she did not seem grateful enough for the privilege of making up the under-garments of Mrs. Hartman's children; and once was so thoughtless as to say, in a moment of earnest expression on some religious theme, "Sister Hartman."
"Sister Hartman! Humph! she is getting past herself." Thus the lady soliloquized, after the poor sewing woman had withdrawn. "I shall have her calling for a visit, and leaving her card, as the next move. She doesn't know her place, and never did. She's quite too familiar. Her way of speaking to me on Sundays, if we happen to meet in the vestibule, has always annoyed me. I shall send her no more work."
And Mrs. Hartman kept her word. Mrs. Royal never called, however, to leave her card, as the other had affected to apprehend. But if she happened to meet her anywhere, it was with the old quiet, self-possessed exterior, that Mrs. Hartman's pride of position felt almost as an insult.
It so happened, in the progress of benevolent movements connected with the church, that the formation of a home for orphan children was projected. The first suggestion came from Mrs. Hartman; and, in consequence, she not only felt a kind of property in the scheme, but a certain right to exercise a controlling influence.
As the plan proposed to include only the orphan children of parents who had been members of the church, Mrs. Royal felt deeply interested in the subject; and as the meetings called for the consideration and adoption of measures for carrying into effect what had been proposed, were open to all the members, she attended them, and made herself clearly conversant with every plan and proposition in their minutest details.
Things had progressed as far as the appointment of lady managers, who had chosen Mrs. Hartman as President. At the minister's suggestion — he understood Mrs. Royal a great deal better than did Mrs. Hartman — the poor widow was elected to serve as a manager in the Board, much to the annoyance of the wealthy member, who really felt the appointment as a kind of degradation to herself and others; and, for a time, actually debated the question whether she should not resign, and let those who would, work in that kind of humiliating association.
At the first meeting of the Board of Managers, Mrs. Hartman submitted, through a lady present, who went along with her in all things, a plan for organizing the Home. According to this plan, a house was to be rented and placed in charge of a Matron, into whose care the children of the institution were to be given. A Visiting Committee were to have the supervision and direction of affairs at the Home. Then followed a detailed plan of discipline and management, in which the children were considered with about as much human regard and motherly tenderness, as if they had been mere animals, with only animal needs. This plan looked well enough on the surface, but the eyes of Mrs. Royal, made clear by love for her own precious little ones, penetrated far below the surface. In imagination, she saw them subjected to all the rigid requirements set forth in the plan of organization, and her heart sickened at the picture. She waited anxiously to hear some modifications suggested; but only words of approval were uttered.
"Perhaps," she said, at length, speaking for the first time —
Mrs. Hartman looked really surprised, and even frowned. It was presumption enough for Mrs. Royal to take her place in the Board; but to venture her opinions there, was going a little beyond decorum.
"Perhaps," suggested Mrs. Royal, "it may help us in this matter, if we think of our own children, and then seek to surround the motherless little ones whom our good-will designs on protecting from evil and sufferings — with some comforts and pleasures, along with our love and care."
"Don't concern yourself on that head," said the lady chairman, with cold dignity, and a look of reproof. "We are Christians, and expect to do right. Expensive Damask curtains, and velvet furniture, our plan certainly does not embrace. But simple necessaries, and arrangements for health, will be provided amply."
The contrast of spirit and personal bearing between the two women, was too marked not to make its impression on the minds of the ladies present.
"These kind of expensive things, of course, are not contemplated," calmly replied Mrs. Royal. "But, as I have intimated, it will help us in the right establishment of this Home for motherless children, if we feel as mothers — in all that we do and provide. Now, you have heard the plan of organization read, with all the details to be carried out by the Matron in charge. It sounds very well. But let us go down to the particulars, and take down with us our own tender little ones, and ask ourselves, if we could leave them in the iron boundaries of such a discipline, without a shiver in every heart-string? No, my sisters, we could not! All babes are alike precious. Yours, mine, and the babes of the sad pauper who dies in the almshouse. And they are alike tender, and would be as humanely cared for, if the hearts of Christian men and women were filled with the divine love of Him who said, 'Let the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not, for of such is the kingdom of Heaven.' Let us not, then, bind ourselves, at this early stage of proceedings, to anyfixed discipline for the Home we are about to establish; but, first, select the right woman for Matron, if such a one can be found, and leave a great many little things to her loving heart, and wise perception. Pardon me, sisters, for saying so much. But, my heart is in this thing."
There was a quiver of feeling in the voice of Mrs. Royal, as she closed and sat down, which touched more than one who had listened to her earnest appeal.
"You have heard the plan of organization," said Mrs. Hartman, with something of contempt in her voice. "Shall the vote on it now be taken?"
She paused, and looked from face to face. A feeble "Aye" — "Aye" — was heard from two voices. Then all was still. Mrs. Royal's words had made no light impression. A lady, whose social position and influence in the church was in no respect inferior to that of Mrs. Hartman, now arose and said —
"Our good sister Royal has spoken well. As mothers, let us give a portion of true motherly love to the poor little ones we seek to benefit. We need not rob our own children in doing this; for God will fill our hearts even fuller of love for them. I agree with sister Royal, that much depends upon the character of the Matron we select. She should, herself, be a mother; a wise, loving, tender mother. But, where are we to find such a one?"
The lady's eyes turned, by an almost involuntary movement, towards Mrs. Royal; and others looked in the same direction. There seemed to be a common perception in the minds of a number, that she was just the woman for the position.
"Sister Royal has just said," continued the lady, "that her heart is in this thing. Why may not her hands be engaged in it, also?"
She paused again. Mrs. Hartman's face flushed, and she moved in her chair, uneasily. Her whole manner repelled the idea. The way in which Mrs. Royal received the suggestion, showed that a thought of such a thing had never crossed her mind. She was startled and embarrassed.
"What do you say?" the lady addressed Mrs. Royal.
"I can say nothing," was the poor woman's answer; "because, in the first place, I have not given the subject a thought; and, in the second place, circumstances do not warrant its consideration now. Neither you nor I would be in freedom. But, as my name has, most unexpectedly, been used in this connection, and as no further proceedings can go on unembarrassed while I remain, with permission of the President, I will retire."
Mrs. Hartman gave a stately assenting inclination of her head, and Mrs. Royal promptly withdrew.
"She is not the woman for that position," said Mrs. Hartman, in a very decided manner.
"She shall never fill it with my consent," chimed in the lady, who had offered the plan of organization.
"Nor with mine, either," said the one who had suggested the name of Mrs. Royal, "IF there is anything in her character or disposition which would unfit her for so important a position. We must have the right person, and, in order to secure this, must act without fear or favor."
"My own view of the case," remarked another of the Managers, "as far as I can see, Mrs. Royal is just the woman we are in search of; though I would not have thought of proposing her; nor am I at all certain that she will undertake so important a duty. My own impression is, that her health is too feeble."
"It is just what she needs to give her renewed health," said another. "She is killing herself with confinement over the needle. Take her out of her present life, and give her one of more scope, and increased activity of mind and body, and, my word for it — you will add ten years to her life. Leave her where she is, and in less than half of that period, you will be called on to receive her orphans into your Home."
"Then have we not a double duty before us?" queried the member who had brought the name of Mrs. Royal before the meeting. "And, indeed, is not Providence leading us into the right way. He will so lead us, if we, in heart, desire to accomplish the good thing now in our minds. Suppose, with Mrs. Royal in view, we appoint a committee with our minister. He knows her better, perhaps, than any one of us."
"Not better than I do," interrupted Mrs. Hartman.
"First, then," answered the lady to this, "let us hear our President. She is not in favor of Mrs. Royal. Of course, she must know something, that, in her mind, constitutesdisqualification. She may give information that will enable us to decide at once. If Mrs. Royal is unfitted for the place of Matron, I am the last one to advocate her appointment."
Thus appealed to, Mrs. Hartman could not hold back. Yet, what had she to say? What had she to allege against Mrs. Royal? She searched along memory's quickly-turned pages, but no pertinent facts were disclosed.
"She'll give you trouble, take my word for it, if you make this appointment," said Mrs. Hartman, with ill-concealed unkindness of feeling.
"I have known Mrs. Royal for a good many years," was the answer of a lady to this, "and I have seen nothing in her, during all that time, which has left an unfavorable impression. She is a humble-minded Christian."
"Humble minded!" echoed Mrs. Hartman. "She is anything but that. Once she did sewing for my family; but, her free, presuming way of putting herself on an equality with me, was more than I could stand. So I changed my seamstress. Humble-minded, indeed! She gave evidence of that today, I think."
"We are getting rather ahead of our work," suggested a member. "The question really before us is, a consideration of the plan for organizing the Home. With permission, I would move the appointment of a committee of three to consider that plan, and to confer, at the same time, with our minister."
This motion was seconded, and carried without debate.
"I now move," said the lady, "that the subject of a Matron be referred to the same committee."
This was also seconded, and carried.
"How shall that committee be appointed?" inquired Mrs. Hartman.
"I nominate Mrs. Wilkins," said a lady. Mrs. Wilkins was the member who had suggested Mrs. Royal as the right person for Matron.
"I nominate Mrs. Hartman," said another.
"Mrs. Armor," said a third.
No further nominations being made, a vote was taken, and the ladies mentioned, elected to serve on this important committee.
The first impulse of Mrs. Hartman was to decline the appointment. But a feeling of opposition to Mrs. Royal, and a wish to prevent her election to the office of Matron, ever came this impulse.
"She will never be the Matron of that Home!" she said, resolutely, to herself, as she walked away from the meeting, "I'll compass Heaven and earth to circumvent the scheme. Mrs. Royal, humph!"
There was a feeling of bitter contempt in the heart of the lady.
"To set herself up to oppose and criticize my plan of organizing the Home; and to intimate that there was in it no Christian or motherly spirit! Humph! She expects her young hopefuls to be sent there before long, and wants damask curtains and velvet furniture. She's got above herself!"
In this spirit, Mrs. Hartman returned from the meeting called to organize one of the purest charities in which the heart can engage. On her way home, it occurred to her that, as she had great influence with the minister, the first and best move for her was to see him before any other member of the Board of Managers, and get him committed to her views. So she turned aside and called upon the clergyman.
"Well," said she familiarly, and with some earnestness of manner, as soon as she was seated with him, "we have had our meeting."
"For organizing the Children's Home?"
"Yes."
"You are moving in the right direction. God's tenderest love is towards little children; and if we care for them in the right spirit, God will care for us. If even the giving of so small a thing as a cup of cold water does not lose its reward, how much of blessings may we not call down upon our souls by enlarging our charities."
Mrs. Hartman did not respond with warmth to these sentiments. She felt a little embarrassed, for the minister's words had sent a gleam of light into certain corners of her mind where dusty cobwebs hung.
"There has been a committee of conference appointed," she remarked.
"Ah! Conference with whom?"
"With yourself."
"Indeed. On what subject?"
"We wish to submit our plan of organization; and also to consult you about a Matron, in whose care the children may be placed."
"Important questions to consider," said the minister. Has anyone been suggested as worthy to occupy the post of Matron?"
"Someone named Mrs. Royal," replied the lady. There were rejection and contempt in her manner.
"The very person I have had in my mind's eye from the beginning!" said the minister. "If sister Royal will accept the place — then there is no need to seek further."
"Oh, there's no fear as to that," answered Mrs. Hartman, with ill-suppressed chagrin. "She'll jump at it."
"Then you may consider yourselves, or rather the motherless children who are to have care, protection, and love — as most fortunate. Sister Royal is a true Christian woman."
Mrs. Hartman's feelings were thrown into a state of fresh disturbance. "Is it possible," she said within herself, "that I am to be over-ridden and circumvented in this matter!"
"Perhaps," she suggested, "I may have enjoyed better opportunities for close observation than you possess."
"Not at all improbable," returned the minister. "And as it is plain that you do not favor the selection of Mrs. Royal, I hope you will speak out freely, and state your objections in all candor. In this matter, we are not to consult private feelings or prejudices, but to look to the good of those little ones entrusted to our care by God."
"In the first place," said Mrs. Hartman, in reply, "she is above herself. She doesn't know how to keep her place now; and therefore, it is plain, that if elevated to so important a trust, she will be forever intruding her own opinions, and insisting on her own views of things, and so give us endless trouble. Why, this very afternoon, the moment a carefully-digested plan of organizing the Home was offered for acceptance, she, and she only, made opposition."
"On what ground?" asked the minister.
"Oh, I can hardly remember now. Some absurd objection, I believe, about the way in which the children were to be cared for. She wanted damask curtains, velvet furniture, and all that, for them, if I understood the drift of her remarks. It was a mistake ever to have put her upon the Board of Management; and we shall have trouble so long as she is there. I, for one, don't intend demeaning myself in any controversies with her; and if she holds her place in the Board, and is as forward as she was today at all of our meetings, I shall resign."
The minister's aspect became grave. He looked down deeper into the lady's heart than she imagined, and saw that pride was at work far more actively than a spirit of unselfish benevolence."
"She shall never be the Matron, with my consent." Mrs. Hartman drew up her head in proud self-consciousness.
"Nor with mine," answered the minister, "unless eminently qualified for the office."
"That she is not," was the lady's positive asseveration.
"I am afraid, sister Hartman," said the minister, after musing for a little while, "that you have permitted some prejudice to creep into your mind."
"Oh, no!" Mrs. Hartman flushed a little, bridled a little, and looked a little dignified.
"Our hearts are very deceitful, sister," there was a kind smile on the minister's face, and a tone of interest in his voice — "'Our hearts are deceitful,' the Bible tells us, 'and desperately wicked.' We must watch, therefore, lest its natural inclinations lead us astray. I have already seen, that you were annoyed at the election of Mrs. Royal to a place in the management of this proposed Home; and I think, if I may speak plainly to you on the subject, as is my duty, that I have penetrated the reason thereof. But before going a step further, let me ask, my sister, whether you can bear the truth, if in that truth, should come to you an accusation of wrong, both in feeling and conduct?"
"Oh, I am not perfect; I am only human," said Mrs. Hartman, in reply, her manner becoming much disturbed.
"God looks into our very thoughts; yes, and below these, to the secret impulses of feeling which quicken them into life," remarked the teacher, impressively. "He knows us betterthan we know ourselves. He is not a respecter of people, nor a regarder of position or worldly influence. Has he not chosen the poor of this world, rich in faith, and heirs of the kingdom? Are not all little children precious in his sight?"
The minister paused, and the eyes of his listener fell beneath his earnest look.
"Sister Hartman," resumed the minister impressively, "I fear that the earthly good things poured so bountifully into your lap by a kind Providence, have been regarded as evidences of superior goodness on your part; and that you have allowed that dangerous enemy, spiritual pride, to creep in and blind you to real good in others, who walk in humbler paths. I know Mrs. Royal well. For years I have noted her incomings and her outgoings. I have seen her in the midst of sore trials, and under the pressure of heavy burdens. Yet, was she always patient, kind, enduring and self-denying. Steadily has she moved onwards, keeping the quiet tenor of her way; faithful to all duties; even-tempered; unobtrusive, yet never losing her womanly self-respect. In a word, Mrs. Hartman, her life, as I have read it, and my opportunities have been large, has been the life of a Christian. Can more be asked?"
"I think," said Mrs. Hartman, not disposed to let her minister have it all his own way, "that for a woman in her station, Mrs. Royal is entirely too forward. She meets you, with theequal air of any lady in the land. And yet she is only a sewing-woman. I quit giving her work, on this very account. Her manner always annoyed me. Why, she would 'sister Hartman' me, with the sewing in her hand!"
"Is that so?" asked the minister, in a tone of surprise.
"Indeed it is so!" replied Mrs. Hartman, entirely mistaking the tenor of her minister's thoughts. "And it was very annoying. She did it once, before a lady visitor, and I was mortified to death about it. I made up my mind, then, that she and I would have to walk by different ways through the world; and it has been so ever since."
"There is only one safe way through the world, Mrs. Hartman," said the minister, "and by that way all must go who expect to gain Heaven at the journey's end. Sister Royal, I think, is in the right way — the Way of duty, self-denial, and humility. You, I fear, have wandered a little."
"Me!" Mrs. Hartman felt this to be almost an outrage. Mrs. Royal on the road to Heaven — and she astray! Now, that was going too far!
"All souls, remember," said the minister, with impressive force, "are equal in the sight of God, who never regards the worldly position of anyone. The wife of Edward Hartman is no more in His eyes, than the humble widow who makes her garments; nay, nor of so much value, if the humble widow is richer than she in the possession of heavenly graces. To think thus, may hurt the base false pride of our evil hearts; but, if we assume to be Christian men and women, let us conform our lives to the pure doctrines of the Gospel. If we do not, our religion is vain, and we are deceiving ourselves."
Before Mrs. Hartman retired from the minister's, she understood the true quality of her affections a great deal better than when she called in order to win him, if possible, to her side of the Matron question. He had faithfully done his duty by her — as influential as she was in the church, and dangerous as an opponent; and there was just good enough left in her to react under the probe of his sharply cutting words. He called upon her, early the next morning, in some concern of mind for the result of his plain speaking. Mrs. Hartman was sober and reserved, but not repellent; and there was about her something of the air of one who had suffered humiliation of spirit.
At the next meeting of the Board of Managers, the minister was present by invitation. Mrs. Royal did not attend. When the name of the poor sewing-woman was introduced in connection with the office of Matron for the Orphans' Home, only a feeble opposition was made on the part of one lady. In contrast to this, was testimony in her favor of the strongest character — so strong, that Mrs. Hartman felt rebuked by its accumulation in the face of her previous opposition. When the vote was taken on a motion to fill the office of Matron, not a single "nay" was heard.
The result proved the wisdom of this choice. The Home was at once organized, and Mrs. Royal placed in charge of the motherless little ones who were gathered within its sheltering walls. But, it took Mrs. Hartman a long time to get wholly reconciled. She still held her place as President of the Board, and was on the Visiting Committee; and tried to feel kindly towards Mrs. Royal, as was her duty as a Christian woman.
But she was annoyed when the Matron assumed to differ with her in anything pertaining to the children — the more so, as it almost always happened that the other ladies of the committee saw things with the Matron's eyes, rather than with hers. There was a social gulf between them, which Mrs. Hartman would not have passed, and every seeming attempt on the part of Mrs. Royal to bridge it over, was felt as a presumption that must be repelled.
But, self-discipline was going on. Mrs. Hartman had some earnestness of purpose, and some yearnings after a Christian life. The discipline of time and circumstances was doing its work, and the Divine Providence, which is intimate with every one from the cradle to the grave, so reacting upon her, at every step of her way, that, through pain of mind and pain of body, she was becoming purified and fit for the kingdom.
Ah! how full of 'Mrs. Hartmans' are all of our churches! And how severe must be the humiliating discipline that is to make them humble in mind as true disciples! It is hard, very hard — for human pride to bend its neck for the Gospel yoke! Hard for the lofty to sit down, side by side with the humble follower of the meek and lowly Savior. And yet, to be greatest of all — is to be servant of all.
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