MEDITATION LI.
MEDITATION LI.
THE NOBLE PRINCIPLE.
Spithead, July 19, 1758.
Now I am distant from all my pious acquaintances and civilized friends, who might be a check upon me; and, what is worse, I am out of the church, therefore out of the reach of her discipline. But what is worst of all, I am where true religion is a stranger. Here it is applauded to be wicked; and profanity and impiety are supported at the expense of all that is sacred or valuable.
Here shame is laid aside, brazen impudence is worn on every brow, and he that departs from iniquity becomes a prey to ridicule and scoff. Yet, for all this, how can I commit wickedness, and sin against God? Shall I not improve this opportunity, to witness for piety against all their vileness, and to strike a terror into the most abandoned; for there is no conscience which slumbers so securely—but there are now and then clamors rising within?
What thanks to me to be for God while among his saints, where for very shame I dare not be against him? But surely it is commendable, when called in providence to be among those among whom Satan has his seat, not only to abstain from the sins in which they revel—but to oppose, to reprove, to let my hatred of the vices which they admire, be known, and not to drop my testimony against sin. Though I don't prevail with sinners; though my diligence is not successful—duty must not be slackened.
The sinner mistakes the matter; for he thinks he has liberty to sin in one situation more than in another. But it mightily aggravates his wickedness, because he carries not the awe and belief of God's omnipresence everywhere. Were he at home, no man would be more moral than he. But the eye of man prevails more with him than the omniscience of God; for when he leaves his friends and native land, he leaves the fear of God also (that is, the form of godliness, for he never knew the power thereof) and rushes into sin wherever he goes.
Like the ignorant Syrians, he thinks that God is a God of the hills—but not of the valleys, a God of the land—but not of the sea. And thus, when he casts off men by distance, he sets God also at a distance, and the divine law at defiance. But, to his endless remorse, he shall realize that God sees, not only under the whole heaven—but through the whole heart; and fills not only time—but eternity itself!
As no grateful person would injure a generous friend; so, for my part, I would not sin against God, even supposing that he could not know it. How could I forget your tender mercies, your love, your compassion, your kindness, and supporting grace! How could I sin against your holiness, offend my best, my never-failing friend, wound my conscience, bruise my soul, and trample on your glory! You are ever in the heart which loves you. And you will bring those who willingly forget you to a remembrance of your omnipresence—by the down-pouring of your dreadful wrath. If nothing but the eye of man concerns us—it will make but small impression, and the impression will be quickly gone. But I can never hide from God of Heaven, nor conceal myself from my own conscience.
Moreover, I am bound to be for God by many ties. O how should I honor him whom all dishonor, and witness for him when all are against him! In the time that I alone witness for him, I should not lose the opportunity which may never be put into my hand again. How then should I love him, whom sinners refuse to love; and hate sin the more that ungodly men love it! Surely my zeal should be the warmer—since ungodly men have lost all zeal for God and his glory.
What can be more ungrateful than to sin against that God who has sent his Son to save me—than to offend him who defends me every day; than to cast off his fear, who has fed me all my life long; than to join a multitude against him, who, passing by the multitude, has chosen me to eternal salvation? I should have an eye to his glory; and his love should be always before me. His greatness should fill my mind with holy awe, and his goodness with gratitude and joy. But, ah worthless I, how shall I hold up my face when I fall so far short of my duty, and do so little for him, who has done so much—who has done everything for me!
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