Family Relationships

God designed marriage and the family to work - and with His life flowing into it, it does! Love (God's kind of love) is the all-important key to a family's success. Let us first see the contrast of family life without God's love working in it:

The Cycle of Self-Contentedness

God gave Adam and Eve joint authority over His creation (Genesis 1-3). After they had sinned, the Lord told them the consequences of their sin. For Eve it would be: "Your husband...will rule over you" (Gen.3:16). Mankind brought upon itself a vicious circle. Love was replaced by self-centeredness. The husband begins to "rule" his wife in a spirit of tyranny - the wife reacts with a spirit of independence - and the children react with rebellion - which in turn makes the man react in tyranny - and so the cycle goes on.

The Cycle of Love

The Lord Himself provides the proper pattern for the family (Eph.3:14-15). The cycle of love means that love is expressed through each family member (Rom.5:5). Eph 5:21-6:4 reveals the all-important principles for a happy and successful family:

The husband's expression of love is GIVING

The wife's expression of love is SUBMlTTING

The children's expression of love is OBEYING

The Husband

Eph.5:23,25;1 Peter 3:7; Col.3:19

The husband is not a dictator over his wife, any more than Jesus is a dictator over us (Luke 22:24-27; John 13:12-17). Rather, he is the head in the same way Jesus is the Head - he is to lead, protect and provide. . .always with her good in mind, not just his own. He is to love her as Jesus loves the Church, giving himself unselfishly for her to bring her full potential as a person to fulfilment.

(Note how the Bible personally addresses "husbands" - it is not for the wives to preach to their husbands, it is written to the husbands alone.)

The Wife

Eph.5:22-24; 1 Peter 3:16; Col.3:18

Submission is not subservience. It means to "fit in with" or "adjust yourself to" the husband. Adam needed someone of like-kind to fellowship and work with, in order to fulfil God's call and design. The husband and wife are a complement to each other (Gen. 2:18-25). Together they make one complete whole - "one flesh" . The wife expresses her love to her husband by "submitting" to him - fitting herself to his side! That way they walk together as one unit, not separate individuals.

(Note how the Bible personally addresses "wives" - it is not for the husband to tell his wife to submit to him, it is written to the wife alone.)

Parents

Ephesians 6:4; Proverbs 22:6

Children learn what the Fatherhood of God is like through their parents and so we see in God the essential principles for the raising of our children:

Keeping our word (Jeremiah 1:12).

Being consistent (James 1:17; Malachi 3:6).

Loving discipline (Heb.12:4-13; Prov.13:24; 19:18; 22:15; 23:13).

Expressing love (1 John 3:1).

Providing good things (Matthew 7:9-11).

Setting a focus for living (Rom.8:28-29).

The family is very important and precious to the Lord. His great desire is for "godly offspring".

Malachi 2:15