Family Prayer 2
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It is my firm conviction, dear friends, that family prayer is not only too much neglected in the case of some professors—but far too lightly attended to by others. It is not that serious, and solemn, yet delightful service which it should be. Even where it is maintained with the regularity of a fixed habit, it is often lacking in the fervor of a devotional service. It is the performance of a cold or lukewarm formalist, keeping up a decent custom, which he could not altogether omit without seeming to violate his consistency; but not the act of an importunate godly man, breathing out his soul to God for his family, in such strains of devotion, as seem to bless them at the time, and to be the pledges of other blessings to come.
Permit me to mention here two things of great importance connected with family prayer. The first is, that the mere act of familyprayer, with whatever regularity, punctuality, and even seriousness it may be performed, is not to be regarded as the whole of family religion; nor is it to be performed as a substitute for the other parts. The children are to be trained up in the way they should go. They are to be educated in the fear of the Lord. Instruction is a momentous part of the duty of every godly parent. He is not only to be the priest—but also the prophet of his family.
The second thing which I would suggest to those who habitually maintain family prayer, is the vast importance, too great, indeed, for me to describe—of their maintaining general consistency of conduct, and also a kind and conciliatory deportment towards the household. People who regularly observe this godly custom, place themselves twice every day before their children in the character of professors of religion. They are heard reading the Bible and solemnly addressing God, and declare by such acts that they wish to be considered as partakers of genuine piety.
What then if the very chapters they read, and the prayers they present, should actually condemn a large part of their conduct, so far as that conduct has been observed by their family! Will not such worship be offensive to them, and produce a prejudice against religion altogether? We should never forget that those whom we shall call to prayer in the evening, have been watching us all the day long—and with what sentiments will they come to the family altar, that he who is to act the priest, and to offer the sacrifice, has that day been guilty of gross inconsistency?
With what feelings must some apprentices and shopmen, who have been witnesses of their master's bad principles in the shop, listen to his prayers in the family? Or with what emotions must they hear him pray for them, after he has just ceased from threatening, scolding, or oppressing them?
The children can be expected to hear with little reverence the prayers of a father, who is severe, tyrannical, and unkind to them; or obviously lacking in general consistency as a Christian professor. But with what solemn effect, and holy awe, and deep impression are those prayers heard, which flow from the lips of consistent holiness. It may seem severe, and almost impious to offer the advice—but there are some people whom I would decidedly recommend to leave off family prayer—if they are determined not to leave off their inconsistent conduct. It would be far better that family prayer should be omitted altogether, than be employed merely as a substitute for religion, and a cover for hypocrisy.
It is painful to me to express a fear that this solemn and incumbent duty is not only neglected in some families—but that the neglect itself, if not justified, is excused, and that on various grounds. Some plead their inability to conduct the devotions of the household in a suitable manner. Have you ever tried? You know not what you can do, until you have actually made the experiment. It is one of those cases of duty in which assistance may be expected from on high.
But even admitting that you have made the trial, and that after repeated efforts you cannot sufficiently compose your minds, and command language for extemporaneous prayer—a very possible and indeed not uncommon case—you could still avail yourself of those admirable helps, which have been furnished by wise and godly men, in the printed collections of family devotions. It is sincerity that constitutes the salt of all our sacrifices, which may be sprinkled over the pre-composed form, as well as over the genuine prayers. Great care should be taken that the prayer should be read reverently, emphatically, and with great solemnity. And where this is done with slowness and expression, it is not only far better than nothing—but is to be preferred, as I think, to many of those short, incoherent, and, perhaps, almost unvarying supplications, which are presented by some who are ready to despise a form.
By others, a lack of time is urged as an excuse for the neglect. Is not this a most awful admission for a Christian parent? No time to bring down the blessing of God upon his household!
A question will probably be put concerning the duty of females. Where the husband is dead, the obligation for conducting family devotions of course devolves upon the widow with its full weight. Should the husband, however, be still living, and indisposed to the duty, the wife, by his permission, may lead the devotions of the household in his presence; or in the case of his refusal, she should, if she can gain opportunity, collect her children, and make supplication for and with them to God. It is greatly to be apprehended, that in many families where the duty is regularly maintained when the husband is at home, it is always neglected when he is away, even in those cases where the wife is a professor of religion.
Permit me, dear friends, now to ask you with faithful love the solemn question, Is family devotion kept up by you, or are yours the atheistic households, which being without prayer, are without God? You are perhaps kind to your children, hospitable to your friends, attached to your ministers, loyal to your king, patriotic to your country—but are you not forgetful of your God? Alas, that HE should be selected to be the only object of neglect, who deserves and demands to be the first whose interests should be consulted, and whose favors should be sought!
It will require some exertion of moral resolution and decision to begin the neglected practice. If, however, you feel it to be an insurmountable difficulty to commence the service yourself, your minister and pastor will gladly preside at the performance of the first act, and address your household on the subject.
And as to you who do not wholly neglect this duty, bear with me if I ask you whether the service is performed with that regularity, fervor, and attractiveness, which its solemnity and importance demand? Are you indeed the pastors of your households, watching for their souls, as those that must give account, that you may do it with joy, and not with grief? Are your children growing up, in the element of piety, and breathing in your house the atmosphere of devotion? Do they see religion in your character, hear it in your prayers, feel it in your conduct to them, and begin to love it for your sakes, even before they are attached to it on its own account? How do you spend your sabbaths, or at least that portion of them which is spent in your own houses? You attend, perhaps—but twice at the sanctuary; how is the other portion of the day employed?
Are you found, as your godly forefathers were, in the midst of the little circle, with the Bible and the catechism, training up your children in the fear, and nurture, and admonition of the Lord? Rendering religion plain to their understandings by the familiarity of your explanations; attractive to their hearts by the sweet and gentle tone of your address; and so captivating to their imagination by the union of Christian sanctity and parental love, that the recollections of these seasons in after life shall check them in their wanderings, and even recall them to the path of virtue?
Oh, where are these lovely scenes of domestic piety fled, scenes that wherever they exist melt even the frozen heart of infidelity to transient sympathy, and extort from the charmed lips of poetry an echo of the admiration that once ravished the soul of the wicked prophet, "How beautiful are your tents, O Jacob; how lovely are your homes, O Israel! They spread before me like groves of palms, like fruitful gardens by the riverside. They are like aloes planted by the Lord, like cedars beside the waters." Numbers 24:5-6.
Mothers, I would affectionately admonish you. The godly character of your children depends, perhaps, under God, more upon you,than upon your husbands, for these obvious reasons; as a general principle it is true, that children are more tenderly attached to the mother than to the father, and there is a plastic power in your love to soften their heart and mold their character. And besides this, your children are a great deal more with you at that period of life, when the character is first and most permanently formed, than they are with the father. Millions have blessed God on earth, and will prolong the praise in heaven and through eternity, for a godly mother. Mothers, next to ministers, have been the chief instruments of God, in building up the church!
Think of the present privileges and future happiness of a godly household. Their dwelling has in it the ark of the covenant—And the Lord will bless it, and all that pertain to it, because of the ark of the Lord. Such a house stands near to heaven—on its lintel, and the posts of its doors, is the sprinkled blood of the slain Lamb; and when the destroying angels are abroad in the land, they see the life-insuring signal, and pass on. Angels of light, who minister to the heirs of salvation, encamp around the dwelling; and he who is the angels' Lord, the watchful Shepherd who never slumbers or sleeps, is there.
But follow that family to its last, its heavenly, its eternal home—in the mansions of glory—the "Father's house" above. Affliction had, sometimes, united it in a fellowship of tears upon earth, and death sent its members one after another to the silent abode of the grave; until, perhaps, one solitary mourner alone survived to tell the story of his family, and to read in the memorials of the dead, the prophetic characters of his own approaching end. But even he, as he stood in solitude by the tomb of his kindred, uttered the triumph of faith, "not lost—but gone before."
And soon were his anticipations realized—he too died—and there they are, met on that happy shore which death never invades. Oh, thrice happy family! You have ascended from the domestic altar to the heavenly temple, and from the throne of grace—to the throne of glory! The cherubim and seraphim are around you—the spirits of just men made perfect are with you, and God overshadows you and fills you with all his fullness. For this you prayed and sought, and longed and waited. You have met in heaven—eternity is before you—you will never part—you will not go out forever!
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