Holy Spirit Counselor
Holy Spirit Counselor - Part One
Healing your deepest wounds
We choose to construct our walls
The Holy Spirit is our counselor
Logical belief vs experiential belief
The role of our emotions
Our pain is rarely rooted in the present
Holy Spirit Counselor - Part Two
Our beliefs are the root of the pain
Our beliefs are the root of the pain
A lie believed, will FEEL true!
Truth-based negative emotions
The four basic components of healing
The Holy Spirit is eager to speak!
Holy Spirit Counselor- Part Three
Healing your deepest woundsHave you ever wanted to truly break free from the chains of emotional baggage from your past? Were you abused as a child, and it seemed to have scarred your life forever? Many people, even with professional counseling never get the healing and freedom that God intended for us. Do you honestly think that God wants us to struggle through life because of the things which happened to us? Absolutely not! So why are so many Christians struggling with the same issues over and over again throughout their entire life? Why do we have to forgive so-and-so over and over again, and every time she pulls our trigger, we have to make the choice to forgive her once again. The problem never really goes away, it is just suppressed. Is this the king of victory Jesus wanted us to experience? Absolutely not.
I like to get to the root of things and understand what is really going on in that person's situation so the real problem can be solved. A good bandaid just doesn't do the job for me I'm not satisfied with temporary fixes. I want real answers that really work! I want the people I minister with to experience breakthrough that changes their life and doesn't keep coming back. I don't want you to have to forgive your offender 100 times and still be triggered every time he says the wrong thing. I want you to stop wishing you could love those who wrong you, but to actually start feeling compassion and love for them, and having the genuine desire to pray God's will into their lives and feel it in your heart. We all wish we could do that for those who hurt us, but few of us really experience that level of transformation in our hearts. The type of ministry work of the Holy Spirit that I am about to share with you in this teaching is the most life-changing type of ministry approach that I have ever seen. The Holy Spirit wants to heal your deepest wounds so you can live in effortless victory and genuine healing.
We choose to construct our wallsYou are in the emotional mess you're in because of choices you've made because of beliefs held sometimes deep with your heart. You may have chosen to put up a wall which blocks you from receiving love because you've been hurt and your heart believes that putting up a wall will keep your heart safe from being hurt again. The reality is that it doesn't work. Your wall doesn't keep you from getting hurt it only keeps you from freely receiving love as God intended. It's only through receiving the love of God in your heart can be in that safe place that God intended it to be in.
"Behold, I have graven thee upon the palms of my hands thy walls are continually before me."
Isaiah 49:16, KJV
When we build such walls, we choose to hinder our ability to freely receive love, and the single greatest need that we have (the need to be loved) will not be met (at least in the capacity God intended), and out of that lack of our greatest need being fulfilled, all sorts of emotional and life problems will arise. Almost all addictions, for example, are rooted in our need to be loved not being fulfilled. Our capacity to receive love is hindered by these walls which we have constructed which were meant to protect our heart, but actually cause all sorts of other problems. I have often said that if Satan can keep our God-given needs from being met God's way, we become vulnerable to seeking out alternate ways to meet those needs. Sin for that matter, is usually just a vain attempt to manage our emotional pain and lack of fulfillment. Why do we lash out at somebody when they say the wrong thing? We are making them pay for what somebody else did to us years ago as a child. When we fail to love others, we have fallen into sin, because Jesus commanded us to love one another. However, if our own need to be loved isn't being met, because of the walls we have constructed in our hearts, it will be difficult to love others because we really can't freely give something we aren't receiving ourselves.
Do you want to live the life that God intended for you to walk in? Do you want to freely love others as Jesus commanded? Then you'll need to work on those walls in your heart, which are hindering your own need for love from being fulfilled. A heart that is not regularly receiving and fully aware of the love of God, is a heart that will not be emotionally healthy, and therefore that person will be prone to struggle with sin as a vain attempt to meet their God-given need to receive and experience His love.
Here's where the problem lies, we often can't just let down our walls because whether or not we realize it, we believe that our wall is doing something for us (protecting us from getting hurt), and until that belief that our wall is protecting us, it will be difficult to just let it go. This is why so many people cannot let go of their anger is because what they don't realize is that their anger is doing something for them. The key to letting our walls down, is finding out what they are doing for us, and getting truth on them. Until we debunk the lies which cause us to hold on to our walls, we may find it very difficult to truly let go and experience the freedom that God intended.
The Holy Spirit is our counselorI have recently took on a new approach to inner healing ministry, and I don't think I will ever be doing ministry quite the same way. The process is very simple, yet can bring some of the deepest level of healing that I've ever seen. The foundation of this type of ministry is based on these important scriptures:
"But the Comforter [in newer translations they call Him the counselor], which is the Holy Ghost, whom the Father will send in my name, he shall teach you all things, and bring all things to your remembrance, whatsoever I have said unto you."
John 14:26 KJV
<p>"Howbeit when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth: for he shall not speak of himself but whatsoever he shall hear, that shall he speak: and he will shew you things to come."
John 16:13 KJV
When I traditionally addressed inner healing ministry, I would give great advise, good scriptures, and try to break away at faulty thinking patterns in the person I was ministering to. Now my focus is to get the person in a place where they can receive counsel directly from the Holy Spirit, who speaks to their heart and not just their head. While I can change what you logically believe, it is the Holy Spirit that can change what you believe experientially.
Logical belief vs experiential beliefHave you ever known something to be true but just didn't feel like it was true? Like for example, let's say you were struggling with feeling forgiven and loved by God you knew from scripture that God loves you and forgives you, but somehow you just don't feel like that is true. Your emotions tell you otherwise. You struggle feeling like you are not loved or forgiven, but yet you know it's just not true. Most of us have struggled with something that we know in our minds is not true, but in our hearts we sure feel like it's true (that is, if we are honest with ourselves). Did you know that you can hold two opposing beliefs at the same time? Did you know that you can believe one thing in your mind such as "God supplies all my needs" yet the minute you lose your job start having a panic attack? Or no matter how many times you're told that you are forgiven (and quoted all the great scriptures), you still question or wonder if you really are? That is because what you believe in your mind (logical belief) is not always the same thing that your heart believes because of what you have experienced. A good counselor can deal with what you logically believe and work through your issues on a head-level, but the Holy Spirit will work with you on a heart-level, and that makes a world of difference. I'm not saying counselors are ineffective and worthless, but there are many times they only scratch the surface and bring limited healing God wants to bring deep level healing and complete restoration in that person's heart. True and genuine healing at the heart level brings lasting freedom and effortless victory for that individual.
The role of our emotionsThe western mind has really put many of us at a disadvantage. Many times we are told to deny our emotions, that our emotions can lie, or that we just can't go by our feelings. I disagree. Our emotions tell us our our heart really believes to be true. If our heart believes we are not good enough to be loved by God, that's exactly how we will feel, even if we know better in our mind. When a child is taught that it's unacceptable to cry or show or even feel emotion, they are being taught to bury their pain, and that is very dangerous emotionally. We all need to be real about how we feel. Not that we should ever use our emotions to manipulate others, or that we should go around wearing our feelings on our sleeves, thus making others feel like they are walking on egg shells. None of that is healthy, but it is very important that we be real with ourselves about how we feel. Denying our feelings only suppresses our problems, and serves as a hindrance from us getting getting healed.
Our emotions are the bridge to the brief that we hold which keeps us in pain they tell us accurately what it is our heart really believes.
Our pain is rarely rooted in the presentWhen somebody triggers us, it is rarely them who is causing the pain we are experiencing. It is rather that they are rubbing against a painful wound in our past. If a boss tells you that your work just isn't good enough, it would have very little effect if you didn't already believe that you weren't good enough. If your parents made you feel ashamed of a B report card as a kid, you may go through life believing that you aren't good enough, and when somebody comes along and rubs that wound, it will be 10X more painful than if you didn't have that pre-existing belief about yourself. I hope that makes sense.
If somebody tells us we're stupid and we know in our heart that we're not, their words will have little meaning to us. If we already believe that we're stupid in our heart (even though we know in our head that we're not), then somebody comes along and speaks the lie that we already believe in our heart, that will trigger us. We're here trying to deny that awful perceived fact, and how dare somebody comes up to us and tell us something that we're already struggling with!
Rarely our present pain is caused by the present condition. The present condition is almost always triggering something we already believe about ourself or about God because of past experiences. Top
Our beliefs are the root of the pain <p>A parent or teacher can do tremendous damage simply by saying to a child, "You're stupid and will never amount to anything!" or "Getting a B on your report card is just not good enough!" Even though that child can grow up and graduate from Harvard, they may never feel good enough because of that lie their heart was made to believe. They may even become prideful over their degree and put others down in order to feel good. That's because in their heart, they are insecure and feel like they don't amount to much. Sadly, they will live their life trying to overcome this feeling of inadequacy.Some of the lies that I run across in ministry might look like this:
"I'm just not good enough"
"I'm stupid"
"I'm just white trash"
"I'm worthless"
"God doesn't care about me"
"God wasn't there when I needed Him"
"My heart isn't good enough for God"
"I'm not worthy to be healed"
"God doesn't love me or He would have..."
"I'm unlovable"
These types of heart-beliefs will cause tremendous pain. They usually are believed at the scene of the accident, so to speak, when somebody first does the damage to us. Parents are often the ones to cause the damage, because children tend to look to their parents to form our sense of identity. If they say we're stupid, we must be stupid, or so our emotions (heart-beliefs) tells us. That's why somebody can be very intelligent and yet still struggle with insecurity and feel like they are never good enough. Has your mother, father, teacher, or somebody else you looked up to as a child, said something to you that has impacted how you see yourself today?
These lies that our heart believes aren't just things we are told, they can be born out of things that are done to us (abuse, trauma, abandonment, rejection, etc) or events that happen in our life (car accident, loss of a loved one, etc.) . For example, rape and sexual violations have a way of shaping a person for life, but it isn't because of what happened, it's because of what we believed about what happened that keeps us in pain. Many times in ministry, it turns out that a woman who has been raped will believe things such as, "It was really my fault" and "I'll never be clean again."
There are often more than one lie that hide behind each emotion. For example, if you were molested, you likely believe more than one lie which is causing the pain that you suffer from today. You might believe that it was your fault, thereby producing feelings of guilt and condemnation. You might also believe that you will never be the same, that this has changed who you are and that you're a prostitute at heart because you allowed it to happen. In a ministry session, we might deal with the part about it being your fault, and get a measurable amount of freedom and healing in that area, but still feel dirty and shameful. That means there's simply more lies to uncover and get truth on. I like to test the true measure of freedom or healing they have received by asking something like, "On a scale of 1-10, what level would you say you still feel dirty?" This will reveal the healing that they have received, but also give you an idea that there's more to be done. They might say that they now feel complete peace there. A person who was in a car accident might suffer with panic attacks, but believe it or not, it might not just be from the car accident. They may have felt like they've done something unforgivable, and are afraid to die, and the car accident just triggered that belief, and from that point on they suffer from panic attacks. In a ministry session, they may feel the panic, although they are completely safe and what was once a threat is no longer any concern. But for some reason they still get triggered and feel panic and extreme feelings of fear, all while in their mind they know they are safe and have nothing to worry about. This is another classic example of our logical beliefs not being the same as our heart's experiential beliefs. The lies that a person's heart may believe might include things like "I am going to die" or "I am going to hell when I die."
Satan is said to be the father of lies, and when we're wounded, one of his demons are right there to inject a painful lie into our heart, which will keep us locked down to that pain for the rest of our lives (or so he hopes!). A lie believed in the heart will hold a person in life-altering bondage. Jesus made it clear that the truth is what sets us free from the bondage of a lie, and in saying this, He made it clear that a lie can bring much bondage into our lives.
"And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free."
John 8:32, KJV
Do you want to know the truth that will set you free from the tremendous bondage and pain that a lie will put you in? Uprooting those lies is something that the Holy Spirit is very eager to do for YOU (the person reading this article, in case I wasn't clear)! Jesus said that the comforter (or counselor) would come and one of His jobs was to lead us into all truth (see John 16:13). The Bible is also clear that God withholds no good thing from His children (see Psalm 84:11), so we can be absolutely certain that the Holy Spirit's desire is to lead us into the truth that will set us free. Why would God want His child to live in bondage to a lie? Then why would the Holy Spirit withhold truth from us that Jesus said to clearly He would give us?
"...when he, the Spirit of truth, is come, he will guide you into all truth..."
John 16:13, KJV
We may ask God for a brand new BMW and get turned down, but when it comes to asking Him for truth on what our heart believes, this is an area we can be absolutely sure He desires to speak to us . If we aren't hearing, then there's a reason and we need to get to the bottom of it. But don't think for a minute that somehow God doesn't want to speak to you, His precious child, about something like this!
A lie believed, will FEEL true!What feels to be true when you visit that emotion? I didn't ask you what you believe or know to be true, but what feels true? That's what your heart believes. Your emotions don't lie, they merely indicate what it is that your heart really believes. Your mind can be totally convinced and know that you are smart and a very archiving person, but you still feel stupid, worthless, or like you'll never be good enough or measure up. That's because your heart-belief is that you are not good enough for some reason. It could be rooted in a childhood memory, where you brought home a report card with a B on it, and it just wasn't good enough for your parents. That's the kind of stuff that will stick with a person for life, because their heart-belief was damaged through performance-based rejection.
While nearly all negative emotions are lie based (depression, fear, etc.), there are two emotions that are negative but truth based. These emotions are sadness and anger Jesus Himself experienced these two negative emotions. When a person loses a loved one and experiences sadness, or maybe they saw an injustice and became angry those are truth-based forms of these emotions. Anger held on to is not a truth-based emotion. The Bible tells us to be angry but sin not, and not to let the sun go down on our anger. The reason that anger is formed is not the reason that it's held onto years later. Sadness can also be contaminated or surrounded by lie based negative emotions. The goal is to deal with the lie-based pain, and then when pure sadness or anger is left, give it to Jesus and ask Him to carry it. He will carry both sadness and truth based anger. If you try to get truth on sadness or anger in their pure truth-based forms, you won't get an answer because it's not lie-based. You need to get healing for these emotions differently Jesus is there to carry them and take them from us if we will give them to Him.
So far I have explained some of the roots of bondage, but never gave you a structure to go by. There is a very simple structure that I like to follow when doing this type of ministry. It is broken down into four components, which could be spelled out M-E-L-T.
M - Memory(s) where it happened
E - Emotion that you are feeling
L - Lie(s) that you believe which keep you feeling the pain
T - Truth which the Holy Spirit wants to speak into you
Often I find that recognizing the emotion is the first step, then go back to the memories where you felt the same feeling (try to go back to the oldest or strongest memory you can find), then while feeling the emotion, ask what you really believe which is causing this emotion. Once you get to that place, you need to own the lie, and take it before Jesus to get His perspective on it.
One of the most popular lies that we have been fed, is that God doesn't want to speak to us personally. Nothing could be further from the truth! A lot of people have self-worth issues that are hangups when it comes to hearing from God. You need to ask yourself, "What is it that I believe about God speaking to me?" Many times if we are honest with ourselves, the answer might sound like this: "God won't speak to me, because I'm not special enough or I'm a nobody. He has more important people to speak to!" A lot of sincere Christians actually believe garbage like this! Jesus made it clear that even the children are to come unto Him, and talk with Him freely (see Matthew 19:14). There are plenty of scriptures that make it clear that God is not only willing, but desires to speak to us, and expects us to hear from Him on a regular bases. This is true for ALL of God's children. Do you have a child that you never speak to? Do you honestly expect to have a relationship with somebody that you never talk to? Yet today many Christians are shocked when they hear God's voice for the first time. Jesus made it clear that His sheep will hear His voice:
"My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me:"
John 10:27 KJV
You have to have some really twisted beliefs if you think that Jesus doesn't want to speak to you about your deepest hurts and painful beliefs in your heart. You really have to have some distorted belief system in place to honest stand there and think, "God doesn't care about me enough to speak to me about my deepest hurts!" Sometimes we need to stop and ask people what they believe about God speaking to them. Is there a reason why He shouldn't speak to His child who Christ has given His life for? Do you see the self-worth issue I'm putting my finger on here?!? Yet this is a common problem in the church today and it keeps many from even talking to God and listening for His reply.
Sometimes there are fears such as, "What if the Holy Spirit doesn't speak to me?" Then folks, we need to figure out what hangup we have on our end, because the Bible is clear that He is eager to speak to us and lead us into all truth. We're not asking for a million dollars here, we're asking good honest heart-belief questions and need desperately His answer. Do you think that a good and loving God would withhold from such an opportunity? Would you withhold if your child came to you with their deepest wounds and wanted to talk about them? Of course not! Then how much more does God want to speak to us and bring us deep healing to our most painful and damaged areas in our hearts!
"If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not and it shall be given him."
James 1:5, KJV
"For the LORD God is a sun and shield: the LORD will give grace and glory: no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly."
Psalm 84:11, KJV
"Or what man is there of you, whom if his son ask bread, will he give him a stone? Or if he ask a fish, will he give him a serpent? If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him?"
Matthew 7:9-11, KJV
The Holy Spirit is more eager to speak to you than you realize He is just waiting for you to ask and then listen for His reply!