The 7 Commandment

7. You shall not commit adultery.

A Crime Against Property? The Hebrew word for "to commit adultery" indicates that a man, either married or unmarried, has sexual intercourse with a married (or betrothed) woman. He takes into possession what does not belong to him (Deut.22:24). Having sex with an unmarried woman, at least in Israel, would not constitute adultery. The decisive factor was the woman’s status: was she or wasn’t she married? In the case of Judah and Tamar (Gen. 38) Tamar was charged with adultery and not Judah because Judah though she was unmarried.

We might conclude therefore that adultery was a crime against property, but wrongly so. A man’s wife was worth more than a piece of property. Having sex with a slave girl was a violation of property, but not adultery, and a special fine was assessed (Lev.19:20-21). In the case of adultery, the death penalty was required, either by means of fire (Gen.38:24) or stoning (Deut.22:23-24). If this was purely a matter of property, it could have been treated under the eighth commandment (You shall not steal). This commandment involves not merely a violation of property, but a violation of honor. The honor of a husband, illustrated by the Lord’s jealousy, can hardly be restored (Prov.6:34-35; Jer.3:8-9; 5:7; Hosea. 2 and 3). Adultery is a violation of a unique relationship — marriage.

A Still Wider Field of Vision. Yet the seventh commandment cannot be restricted to the act of adultery. Jesus teaches us that in Matt.5:17,28. Not property, but sexuality is the subject of this commandment — principles for sexual relationships. The boundaries of these relationships are given in part in Lev.18 and 20. Prostitution is involved in this discussion for adultery and prostitution are often closely linked in the Bible. But that’s because of the distinction between a married or unmarried woman. Visiting the latter constituted adultery and was punishable by death. But all other forms of prostitution are condemned by the Bible (Lev.19:29; Deut.23:17-18). For a woman to lose her virginity outside of marriage was a shameful thing (Deut.22:13-21). The body is not for prostitution, but for the Lord Jesus Christ. It is a temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor.6:13-14).

Man and Woman. Marriage is an institution of God. The participants of marriage are man and woman. Some, such as Plato, have argued that humanity originated with an androgen and that we should understand the duality of man and woman as brokenness. Modern feminists want to ‘restore’ the brokenness by downplaying differences — hence homosexuality and bisexuality are encouraged. Male or female is a result of nurture, not nature. God is also a He/She. Yet, we must submit to Scripture and to God who said "It is good" about Adam and Eve. The harmonious relationship between man and woman was broken because of the fall. Men and women were to rule the world together but with an order of rank: the man functions as head.

The Goal of Marriage. The goal of marriage is twofold: to propagate and to assist one another. Both are clear in Gen.2:24: A man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife and become one flesh. Cleaving refers to a loving relationship or friendship. Become one flesh refers to sexual relations, but not exclusively so. In Eph. 5, flesh refers to the entire person (see vv.29, 31). Polygamy, therefore, is illegitimate. It does not conform to the marriage instituted at creation. Though God tolerated it, it did bring many problems (Gen.16:4-6; 29:16-24).

Responsible Family Planning. Having children is a purpose of marriage, but being childless does not necessarily indicate a failed marriage. Yet we must not disconnect the goal of marriage from having children. Arguments for remaining childless on the basis of Gen. 1 are not valid. New generations will always be needed as the world turns. Yet children appear in the world not automatically, but as a matter of reflection. This distinguishes human reproduction from animal reproduction. Restricting children may at times be necessary, either by natural or artificial birth control.

Artificial Insemination. What about artificially intervening to enable conception and birth? When it comes to artificial insemination we must distinguish between sperm donated by a husband (AIH where H = Husband) and that by a non-husband (AID - where D = Donor). In cases of AID, contraception occurs beyond the limits of marriage and a third party is introduced in the marriage. This transgresses the exclusive marriage relationship. This is a case of artificial adultery. This cannot be compared to adoption, where both parents stand in the same relationship to the child. The biological aspect is immense, both for the child and his parents. Artificial insemination by a husband need not be rejected.

In Vitro Fertilization. This form of conception occurs in the laboratory where a sperm cell fertilizes an egg in a ‘test-tube.’ The conceived embryo is then transferred into the uterus. Fertilization therefore occurs outside the woman’s body. This has opened the possibility of surrogate motherhood. This is an option for women whose uteruses are not functioning, but who can produce healthy eggs. Here, using IVF an embryo is transferred to the uterus of another woman. Four conditions must be met for this to be approved: 1. The embryo must originate from the woman and her husband; 2. The embryo must be implanted in its own mother (we reject surrogate motherhood). The womb is not a guestroom for a child, but a place where mothers care for their children. 3. All embryos must be implanted. Embryos are human life and we cannot go about selecting the best ones. 4. The embryos must be implanted as soon as possible. Freezing them increases the chance they will be used for other purposes.

Because of Sexual Immorality. The third purpose for marriage is sexual immorality (1 Cor.7:1). Paul speaks soberly about marriage in this passage in 1 Corinthians. This must be read in light of what he writes in Ephesians 5 about the beauty of marriage. Unmarried status deserves preference in Corinth because of the existing crisis (1 Cor. 7:26, 32-40). This is not a regulation for all time. Paul recognizes the strength of sexual urges and so as to prevent immorality, marriage is recommended.

Sexual Pleasure. The above argument can lead to a mistaken conclusion. Those who marry are weak and less spiritual, less devote Christians. People of high spiritual position, like the office-bearers, should not get married. Celibacy is more exalted than marriage. Yet marriage is a holy institution, a divinely ordained institution which originated before man’s fall into sin. There are other reasons, than sexual immorality. Besides when God called his creative work, "very good," he was also speaking of marriage. Sexual enjoyment, also, is exalted in the Scriptures (Prov. 5:18-19 and the Song of Songs). Voluntary singleness can be good, but we should not impose celibacy. The priests were married, as were the apostles of the New covenant (1 Cor.9:5). While sexual enjoyment is exalted, it should not become gluttonous. Not every form of sexual expression is permitted.

En Route to Adulthood. Grapes ripen only in autumn. A child must mature before he is introduced to the world of sexuality. For that reason pedophilia is extremely harmful. Even worse is incest. Regulations against incest were codified in the Mosaic Law (Lev.18 and 20). Masturbation should also be discussed here. The Bible says very little about masturbation. The sin of Onan (Gen. 38:9-10) has nothing to do with Onanism. Onan engaged not in self-pleasure, but in pregnancy prevention to fulfill his levirate duty. We do learn from Lev.15:16-17 and Deut.13:10-11 that nocturnal emissions render a man ceremonially unclean, as do female menstruations. And nocturnal emissions, although effected ‘subconsciously’ do include impure desires. Prayers for forgiveness should include the sins of sleep. We must desire to present our bodies as holy and acceptable sacrifices to God (Rom.12:1).

Choosing a Partner and Preparing for Marriage. The decision to marry has become a personal choice rather than a business one. This is an improvement. In Bible times, many marriages were entered out of love (Michal loved David — 1 Sam.18:18, 20), but many were also arranged apart from love (Isaac’s wife whom he received with love — Gen. 24:67). The basis of a good marriage is the faithfulness that husband and wife pledge to one another. A mutual fondness can grow out of faithfulness. Arranged marriages, therefore, can be successful. And parents should give their input and advice, although they should not compel their children to follow their advice.

Some restrictions must apply to whom we may marry. We may not marry unbelievers because marriage is designed to reflect the relationship between Christ and His church. How then can a believer be yoked to an unbeliever (2 Cor. 6:14-16)? We are called to marry in the Lord (1 Cor. 6:13-20). Marriages require a shared religious foundation so that spiritual unity may be experienced in marriage too.

Cohabiting Without Marrying? Society today does not see the need to marry. Marriage brings with it lifelong commitments which tend to complicate breaking up. This cannot be defended on the basis of Scripture where man and woman are to share life in body and soul with one another. Here are the arguments against it:

(1) In the Mosaic legislation, sexual intercourse was proper only within the context of marriage. If it became evident on her wedding night that a woman was not a virgin, she was stoned to death (Deut. 22:13-21). If a man had sex with an unbetrothed girl, he could be compelled to marry her (Exod. 22:16-17). Sex may not occur outside of marriage (1 Cor. 6:12-20 and 1 Cor. 7:9);

(2) Living together as man and woman affected the broader community. The village community witnessed the marriage of Ruth and Boaz (Ruth 4:7-13). The community can be summoned to serve as witness when promises and obligations are not fulfilled;

(3) The Bible teaches us that living together as husband and wife is a lifelong bond. Just as living together does not require a marriage license, so leaving each other does not require a divorce. By their very nature, the components of love and total life communion between a man and woman require a promise of lifelong faithfulness. Just as government officials are required to make public pledges that hold them accountable, so should husbands and wives.

Homosexuality. Scripture condemns homosexuality in Lev.18:22-23 and Lev. 20:13 along with Rom. 1:26-27. The argument that Leviticus is forbidding cultic homosexuality holds no water. Why is there no forbidding of cultic heterosexuality? Secondly, it is the homosexual act, which is forbidden, quite apart from its context. Romans 1 teaches us that it is ‘against nature.’ What nature means here, as opposed to 1 Cor. 11:14, is determined by the context — creation. The punishments for homosexual behavior have changed, but the moral culpability has not. A person with homosexual desires is not by definition a homosexual. So long as he or she fights against them, they are with all others fighting the good fight of faith.

Adultery and Divorce. A marriage is not a contract which may be dissolved, but a covenant witnessed by God and other people (Prov. 2:17; Mal. 2:14). Adultery and divorce do not mean the same thing. Destroying a marriage by adultery was punishable by death. Divorce was permitted in cases where the husband discovered "something indecent" in his wife (Deut. 24:1). These words likely refer to the shameful behavior of a serious nature. But divorce was never to be routine — Jesus reminds us of that (Matt. 5:31-32). Jesus permitted divorce permissible in cases of sexual immorality since capital punishment was no longer administered for adultery.

The Jews had turned the permission of divorce into a virtue. Divorcing for the most obscure reasons prevented them from committing adultery. Jesus blew the dust of that by saying that divorce and adultery are cut from the same cloth. In fact, divorce opens the door for adultery. Two things are necessary for adultery: a marriage is dissolved which shouldn’t have been and one of the divorced partners marries someone else. When a third party enters the picture and has sex with one of the partners, then adultery occurs. One translation has of Matt. 5:32, "If a man divorces his wife and she has not been unfaithful, then he is guilty of making her commit adultery if she marries again." Compare with 1 Cor. 7:10-11. Divorce turns into adultery if a divorced party marries another. Two possibilities exist: either the divorced parties remain unmarried or they become reconciled.

Permissible Divorces. Matthew 5:32 and Matthew 19:9 argue that divorce certificates were not forbidden on the grounds of sexual immorality. There’s an exceptive clause like this: Anyone who assaults another person, except in a situation of war, and kills him, commits murder. Adultery does constitute grounds for a divorce, but does not necessitate a divorce. A second ground for divorce is willful desertion, based on 1 Cor. 7:15-16. If the unbeliever chooses to leave the believer, the latter is not obligated to remain with the unbeliever at all costs. If the unbeliever is willing to remain married, the couple should remain married. The faith of one has a powerful and sanctifying influence, such that the child is considered holy (1 Cor. 7:14).

It is disputed what is meant by saying the believer is no longer ‘bound’ to remain married to the unbeliever. Is he or she free to marry a second time? If the first marriage is dissolved, a second marriage should be permissible. Paul says to believers who have divorced: Don’t marry again or else be reconciled to your spouse (1 Cor. 7:10-11). He does not say this for this situation.

How do you reconcile Jesus with Paul? They were dealing with different situations. The difference is formulated clearly by William Ames: There’s a ground for effecting divorce (Matthew) and there’s a ground for acquiescing in divorce (1 Corinthians). Willful desertion, as introduced in 1 Cor.7. may have broader applications by analogy. Each case must be evaluated individually. The question of culpability is especially difficult to establish. The lovelessness of one can drive the other into the arms of a third. The first is the innocent one, yet the source of the trouble.

Divorce Without Subsequent Marriage. If there are legitimate grounds for divorce, these can also be legitimate reasons for marrying again. A divorce is a break in the marriage, but before God husband and wife are not separated. They are not free to enter a new marriage.

Abstaining in Freedom. In this whole area of being unable to remarry, a Christian can be severely tested in his or her obedience to the seventh commandment. For many, a subsequent marriage or sexual intercourse must be given up. The remedy can only be the gospel which shows us that we are on the way to a place where people neither marry nor are given in marriage (Matt. 22:30). Freedom consists in crucifying the flesh with its passions and desires (Gal. 5:24).

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