Instruction to Children
This month we are continuing our study on the subject of marriage. As we have discussed in our past lessons, God created man (Adam) and from the rib of that man, God built the woman, (Genesis 2). God made only one woman from the rib of man, and so it has been since the beginning. God has ordained one woman for one man and although poligamy existed in the Word of God it is not, and never has been God's will. Confusion always entered when poligamy existed.
From the beginning God established Eve for Adam -- one woman for one man. The first recorded case of poligamy in the Bible came in Genesis chapter 4. Lamech was the first man who had more than one wife and he was a murderer! Jacob was the first Jew to have more than one wife. He worked for awhile to get Rachel and ended up with Leah (Rachel's older sister). So he worked seven more years to get Rachel (Gen. 29). The two wives had bickerings
The New Testament
explicitly tells us again, one husband for one wife.
between each other and so Jacob had trouble in his house. It is impossible for a man to have more than one wife and have peace in the house. It cannot be done. Jacob was one of the patriarchs of the nation of Israel. He had established a precedent through his example, but God hadn't. God set the record straight in the law under the leadership of Moses. Leviticus 18:18 and Deuteronomy 17:17 make it very clear that there is to be one wife for one husband. Yet, even after the law was given it was broken. David broke the law. When he met Bathsheba he already had five wives. Solomon had 1,000 women. He had 700 wives and 300 concubines. Elkanah had two wives. One of them was Hannah who was
Sex belongs within the framework of marriage.
continually harassed by Peninnah because she could not have children as Peninnah could. Still, Elkanah loved Hannah (l Sam 1).
The New Testament explicitly tells us again, one husband for one wife. We are told in 1Tim 3 verses 2 and 22 that deacons and elders are to be the husband of "but one wife': We are told also, in Titus 1:6 that bishops are to be the head or husband of but one wife. Christ has one body and just as Jesus is the head of the Church, the husband is the head of one wife. Genesis 2:22-23 says, "And Adam said, 'This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman because she was taken out of Man.' Therefore, shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Notice, because man has met woman - because he has met his future wife, the man is to leave his father and mother. The commandment to leave in-laws was given before in-laws existed. The child is to move away from the authority of the parents and become his own authority and "cleave unto his wife." The word "cleave" very plainly and simply means SEX. God created sex, not the devil. The devil has perverted something beautiful that God created. Sex belongs within the framework of marriage.
Ephesians 5:31 quotes the same verse of scripture as was quoted in Genesis 2:24. It says, "For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. " Notice, the New Testament translates the word "joined" but it means the same thing as "cleave". This refers to the physical act of sex. The Greek word for "sex" is the word "kollao".
Marriage is far beyond physical sex -it is a soul relationship.
First Corinthians 6:16 says, "He which is joined to a harlot is one body." The Greek word here for 'Toined" is simply the word "sex". He that has sex with a harlot, for the moment is one flesh. In Ephesians 5 the word "kollao" is used but it has a different beginning. It is actually "proskollao". It is usually translated as the word "joined", but it actually means "face to face sex" and refers to an intimate relationship. God has designed man and woman to come into a covenant relationship with each other and therefore, marriage is far beyond physical sex -- it is a soul relationship. Hebrews 13:4 says that "Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled." The word translated "bed" in this verse is not the word "bed" at all. It is the word "koite", from
The evil woman
is more wicked than the strange woman.
which we get the English word "coitus". This verse is more accurately translated, "and the sex act in marriage is undefiled." Outside of marriage the sex act is defiled. In the confines of marriage sex is beautiful, honourable, and undefiled. Notice what the verse goes on to say, "whore-mongers and adulterers God will judge. Outside the ranks of marriage God said He will judge the sex act, but inside the marriage it is undefiled.
The book of Proverbs, chapter 5 gets right down to the root of this topic. Solomon wrote the book of Proverbs from what he remembered of his father David's teachings. David was very honest and he laid it on the line with Solomon about women, and about the pitfalls of life. David taught Solomon about the different types of women that he could be seduced by. He taught him how sex outside of marriage seems good for the moment, but in the end it brings terrible results in your life.
Proverbs chapter 5 begins with, "My son, attend unto my wisdom." The term "my son" means "builder of the family name." Children are not only to have a heritage passed on to them, but they are to build upon that heritage. God plans for every generation to get more righteous, more sanctified, more prosperous, more healthy, and to spread the Word of God. Again, Proverbs 5:1 says, "My son, attend Unto my wisdom." The word "attend" means "to concentrate". In other words this verse says, "Attend, or concentrate, upon my wisdom and bow, or incline thine ear to my understanding. Don't only listen to my Word, but submit to it." It is one thing for a child to listen to the words of his parents, but it is quite another for a child to submit to that word. David is saying here, "Solomon, don't only listen to what I'm teaching you, submit to it -- do the Word."
Verses 3 and 4 of Proverbs 5 continues, "For the lips of a strange woman drop as a honeycomb and her mouth is smoother than oil. But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two edged sword." The strange woman spoken of in this verse is the prostitute. The first woman David warns Solomon about is the prostitute. We find basically the same words in Proverbs 6, beginning in verse 20. It reads, "My son, keep thy father's commandment, and forsake not the law (or teaching) or teaching of thy mother. Bind them (the commandments, laws, teachings) continually upon thine heart, and tie them about thy neck." Meditation binds the Word of God around us. Meditation binds the Word, first, on the child's inward man (the heart) and next, around his neck. The Word becomes like a leash to guide the child when parents are no longer with the child to guide him. Verse 22 of chapter 6 continues, "When thou goest, it will lead thee; when thou sleepest, it shall keep thee;
The Word becomes like a leash to guide the child when parents are no longer with the child to guide him.
and when thou awakest, it shall talk with thee." There will be a day when your children will leave your presence but they will never leave the presence of the Word of God. There will come a time when your child will be led by the Word of God, protected by the Word of God, and the Word of God will speak and talk to him because the Word will become his best friend.
Verse 23 says, "For the commandment is a lamp; and the law is light; and reproofs of instruction are the way of life." There comes a day, parents, when you must cut the apron strings, but God will never cut the apron strings. While your children are growing up they are bound to you and it is your responsibility to ensure that the Word of God is bound to them. Proverbs 6:24 continues, "To keep thee from the evil woman, from the flattery of the tongue of a strange woman." Notice, two women are brought out in this verse. The "evil woman" is adulterous. The "strange woman" is a prostitute. The Word of God will protect your child from both. The evil woman is more wicked than the strange woman. Both are wrong, but one is more wicked than the other. Flattery is connected with the strange woman" -- the prostitute.
Verse 25 says, "Lust not after her beauty in thine heart; neither let her seduce you with her eyelids." Next, she'll come along with very smooth words that drip like a honeycomb. Praise tries to put something into you and flattery tries to get something out of you. Flattery is a lie. It tries to find something good about you and use it to bring you in, hook you, and get something out of you. Proverbs 6:26 says, "For by means of a whorish woman a man is brought to a piece of bread ..." This verse literally says, "The price of a whore is about one loaf." That very same verse continues, “.. and the adulteress will hunt for the precious life." What is the difference between the prostitute and the adulteress? The prostitute is out to get enough money for one day. The adulteress is out to get everything you possess. She's out to steal your very life. She doesn't need sex -- she has it with her husband. She doesn't need possessions -- she has them with her husband. The adulteress woman is out for your precious life, men. Women, the adulteress man is out for your precious life. He'll give you all kinds of promises about what he's going to do, but he won't keep those promises. He's just out to steal the precious life out of you and when he's through, he'll drop you like a piece of garbage.
Verse 27 of Proverbs 6 says, "Can a man take fire in his bosom (his inward
God's Word is good for helping a child develop patience until the right one comes along.
man) and his clothes not be burned?" Learn to put the fire out on the inside. Never let it come to the outside. Don't pet it, don't try to understand it -- flee from it, put it out. Learn to dash water on it when it is on the inside of you. God's Word is good for putting out the fire. God's Word is good for helping a child develop patience until the right one comes along. Verse 28 says, “Can one go upon hot coals and his feet not be burned?" If you don't put out the fire, your feet will get burned. Do not think you can run across the hot coals and not get burned.
Continuing in Proverbs 6:29-33, "So he that goeth in to his neighbour's wife; whosoever toucheth her shall not be innocent. Men do not despise a thief, if he steal to satisfy his soul when he is hungry; But whoso committeth adultery with a woman lacketh understanding; And a wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away." When you get into adultery you start slowly decaying your ability to love.
Notice where adultery begins - in one's thoughts.
The "wound" is physical and "dishonour" is in your soul. You are eventually going to destroy your body.
Committing adultery is different than stealing a loaf of bread. If you are caught stealing a loaf of bread, you can give 7 times back. Once you have given back 7 leaves and the substance of your house, your crime is forgotten -- your crime is over. But how do you repay adultery? How do you give back money for something that somebody else has taken out of your marriage? There is not enough money in the world that can pay back what someone has done to your wife or your husband when it comes to adultery.
Again, in verses 33-35, Solomon writes, "A wound and dishonour shall he get; and his reproach shall not be wiped away. For jealousy is the rage of a man: therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance. He will not regard any ransom; neither will he rest content, though thou givest many gifts." Who is the man that jealousy is the rage of? The adulteress woman's husband. One may answer, "Well, I'II give him my car – “I’ll give him my paycheque -- I'II give him £1,000." No, the Word says he won't regard any ransom.
Job 31:1 says, "I made a covenant with mine eyes; why then should I think upon a maid?" Eyes throughout the Word of God refer to the soul. Notice where adultery begins--in one's thoughts. First, you think the thoughts, then you pet the thoughts until eventually those thoughts erupt. Long before adultery ever becomes an outward manifestation, it first is an inward thinking.
Verses 9-12 of Job 31 go on to say, "if mine heart have been deceived by a woman, or if I have laid wait at my neighbour's door; Then let my wife grind unto another, and let others bow down upon her For this is an heinous crime; yea, it is an iniquity to be punished by the judges. For it is a fire that consumeth to destruction, and would root out all my increase." Adultery is a tool of Satan to steal the prosperity that God has given to you because that prosperity is the tool that God uses to spread the Gospel of the Lord Jesus Christ. Satan doesn't care about you. He'll use you any way he can and when he's through with you he'll throw you on the trash heap.
Please look again at Proverbs 5:3-4: "For the lips of a strange woman drop as an honeycomb, and her mouth is smoother than oil: But her end is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two edged sword. Wormwood was a drug that grew wild and in Solomon's day, kids used to chew on it. It would give them a temporary high, but as soon as the high was over, it had one of the sharpest bites and would actually bring on headaches, depression, and eventually would destroy the mind so that the child could not think anymore.
In the above verses, the Word is comparing the strange woman to wormwood. Listen to me -- wormwood destroys the soul and the two-edged sword destroys the body. God has designed for marriage to be the most fantastic experience you have ever had.
Wormwood was a drug that grew wild and in Solomon's day, kids used to chew on it.
Fornication is sin and if you have dabbled in it, you have committed sin. But, if we confess our sins, God is faithful and just to forgive our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Remember David who went after Bathsheba, had her husband Uriah killed, and was out of fellowship with God for over a year. But David repented, and went on to be a better king than he had before. When God forgives, God forgets, and then He lifts you up and gives His strength to you so that you are able to mount up with wings as eagles, run and not be weary, walk and not faint.
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