Difference between revisions of "Meditation CXII."
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Latest revision as of 12:40, 7 January 2020
Meditation CXII.
ENVY.
May 10, 1761.
It was a saying of Moses, the man of God, when one told him that two men prophesied in the camp, "Are you envious for my sake? I wish that all the Lord's people were prophets." The holy man took it not amiss that others had of the some spirit he had, to perform the same functions, and shine in the same character.
What a shame is it, then, that the children of God should envy one another for the excellencies of their gifts and graces! If God is greatly glorified by any, should I be greatly displeased that it is not by me? Shall I contend with God about his distribution of blessings, and begrudge his liberality to any more than myself? Does one minister darken another in preaching, or one saint excel another in prayer? Who of Christ's servants can be darkened if their Master shines? Or who of his saints will not bless him for his goodness to others as well as to themselves?
It is as base to be peevish because of the excellencies of others; as to be proud of our own. Our great, our universal struggle should be to set up God on high, and our great joy should be to see him set on high—whoever is the happy instrument. Ah, how base to bow the ear to vulgar applause, and listen to, or lust after, empty fame! In the natural body, is the one hand affronted that the other hand wears the ring? And among David's worthies, were the thirty chagrined that they did not attain to the first three?
Then why should saints and the servants of God, envy one another! Surely, it is rare to have singular gifts and graces, and not know of it; and it is almost impossible to know it, and not be puffed up in a greater or less degree. O what a degree of humility should the spiritual worthy pray for, lest at any time he be puffed up with pride!
Should the servant of Jesus take it ill that hearers flock more after others, rather than himself; seeing it is, at least should be, still Christ they are running after? Can it vex him, if he speaks in sincerity, because some are masters of more eloquence than he?
O for that noble disposition of blessing God with a cheerfulness for the singular gifts of others whereby he is glorified—which should be my whole aim! Let others excel in setting you upon high, though you should always refuse my service. Let the spiritual temple be built, though I should never lay one stone in the edifice.
Give liberally, very liberally, to all your saints and servants, and my eye shall never be evil because your is good. It is enough to be a cup in your house, though others be bowls and flaggons. Surely the loyal subject will give his joyful acclamation at the coronation of his king, though not permitted to place the crown on his head, or perform any of the ceremonies. Is there any dissonance among the stars (nor should there be among the saints) because one star excels another in glory?
Such and such gifts, or such and such degrees in these gifts, which I strive for, might hurt me. Fire may be kept in a brazen vessel, which would burn a wooden one. Boiling water might crack a glass bottle—but not a stone bowl. So these qualifications which I think would make me all vigor and spirit, might hurt my spirit in more spiritual things. Few, like Moses, could carry a command so vastly great, with a vastly greater meekness; or have the humility to cover his face when it shines, and reflect the glory God-ward. Though I could pray like an apostle, and speak like an angel; yet, if the least pride springs from the performance, it were better to speak like a babbler, and pray like a babe in grace.
I should press after grace continually, and grace in the highest degree—without which the noblest gifts will be but noise and smoke, without heat; while the weakest gifts, with true grace, may edify both myself and others. I should rest satisfied in the all-wise disposal of Providence, who gives to all as he pleases; since, though there be diversities of gifts, it is the same Spirit who knows best how to divide, and to whom.
And if God is exalted, though I should exert myself, and would choose to excel; yet I should not take it amiss, that in that excellent work everyone excels me, and out-does my utmost. Finally, though my capacity may be weak, and my faculties shallow, yet hereby may all my deficiencies be made up—if I am rich in faith, to draw out of his fullness for my exigence; if I am rich in humility and gratitude, to disclaim anything in myself, and give him all the praise; and if I am rich in love to God, to pour out my whole soul on him, while he kindly dwells in my heart, and replenishes every power with his presence.
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